Feeding Frenzy 3

"Me retire? What a laugh"

At the health care summit, Republican Senator Eric Cantor used the 2,400-page Senate health care bill and the White House’s 11-page proposal as props in his discussion. One was too short, apparently; the other, too long. Cantor may be trying to establish the Goldilocks Doctrine, but it’s unclear how this will lead voters to support the Republican proposal.

Here is the Republican proposal in its entirety:

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    A UC Davis student is petitioning to make the word “hella” the SI prefix for 10^27. There are uses for it: for example, the mass of the earth is about six hellagrams.

    I won’t make the obvious joke about shit-tons, but I think it’s clear that this idea is hella stupid.

    Six Hellagrams?

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    Bristol Palin is going after her babydaddy, Levi Johnston, for child support money. What have we learned from the court documents?

    • Levi Johnston earned over $100,000 last year for nude modeling.
    • Ironically, the lawyers cite Virgin v. Virgin, comparing Levi Johnston to “Mr. Virgin.”
    • Tripp Palin gets socialized health care.

    Watch out for those death panels, Tripp.

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    Jay Leno is quietly slinking back to his old time spot after NBC’s late-night debacle. I think that Conan should have sucked it up and moved back to his old time slot. It’s not that I like Conan less than Leno—the opposite is true—I just hate Jimmy Fallon much, much more.

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    On CNN, Ann Coulter compared the Iraq war to World War II, saying, “they’re both wars.” Seriously.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7EvEAVZNro

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