Good Sex Is Rare–And Necessary
I didn’t realize how much I took my sex education for granted until I came to Wash U. I went to a loosely Christian-affiliated school in Minneapolis, where puberty education was a part of sixth grade health, and we moved into sexual education in grade seven. A few weeks of health class were devoted to sex ed in grades seven, eight, and nine. For me, the experience was slightly uncomfortable, but it wasn’t traumatic or fear-based. We learned about the potential risks, including the implications of pregnancy, but also discussed safe and protected sex.
We spent a considerable amount of time learning about many different forms of birth control and some of their benefits and problems. Although abstinence was listed as a birth-control method, the conversation was more focused on safe sex than on trying to convince us not to have it. We practiced putting condoms on bananas and learned how to properly use female condoms. We learned about oral contraception. My teacher taught us about the morning-after pill and told us where to find it. There were forums to ask anonymous questions, and for the most part that worked pretty well. Never once, in three years, did any of my teachers make sex sound shameful. Certainly my school has room for improvement: We could do a much better job of being inclusive of all sexualities and increasing our emphasis on consent. However, I did not realize how much these faults paled in comparison to much of the country.
Until recently, I thought that was normal. I didn’t realize that only 24 states require sex education in public schools. According to the Guttmacher Institute, a research organization devoted to promoting sexual and reproductive rights, only 13 states necessitate that sex education be medically accurate if it’s provided. There are 26 states that mandate that the information be age-appropriate, and only two states that prohibit the programs from promoting religion. The most common criteria is that parents are allowed to prevent their children from learning the material; this is the case in 36 states. Thirty-nine states required that abstinence be included, and in 27 states it must be stressed. Only 20 states even require that condoms or contraception be covered in the material. There are states where the content centers around the importance of only having sex after marriage, and lessons stress the negative outcomes of teen sex. Finally, in Arizona, it is illegal for public schools to “promote [a] homosexual lifestyle,” and in Oklahoma, schools must teach that gay sex is “considered to be responsible for contact with the AIDS virus.”
I have friends who didn’t know what a condom was until they got to college. I had a friend who, as part of her sex ed program, had to spin a wheel and each section was one of the possible things that could go wrong if you have sex. These kinds of experiences are traumatic, and perpetuate the stigma surrounding sex in the United States. Abstinence-only sex education does not reduce the amount of sex people have, but it does make it less safe. In fact, multiple studies show that comprehensive sex ed actually lowers the rate of teen sex, STIs, and pregnancy.
[pullquote]When students don’t learn about sex through education programs, many people find the information in other ways.[/pullquote]
When students don’t learn about sex through education programs, many of them find the information in other ways. Unfortunately, the ways that friends, the media, pop culture, and porn portray sex is not always healthy or positive. Because of common sex myths, people receive misinformation about condoms, expectations, and consent. The way that sex is portrayed virtually never emphasizes protection. Without hearing about it from somewhere else, it could very easily seem like forms of protection are relatively unimportant. There are very few, if any, movies or TV shows where the characters were planning on having sex but chose not to because they didn’t have a condom. Pop culture also creates expectations for how soon to have sex and what it will be like, that are often unrealistic. It’s hard to find any mention of consent in these sources. It’s not that these are inherently wrong ways of talking about sex, but they are not meant to be the foundation of people’s sex education.
[pullquote]Schools need to provide education on contraceptives and consent.[/pullquote]
States need to require comprehensive sex ed. Schools need to provide education on contraceptives and consent. We need to create dialogue that is not only about heterosexual sex. We need to teach people the risks of having sex, in a productive way, and also how to minimize those risks, rather than just teaching abstinence. We need to have ways that students can feel comfortable voicing their questions. Fundamentally, we as a larger culture need to start talking about sex, and it needs to start with proper education in schools.
Annie Johnston ‘21 studies in the College of Arts & Sciences. She can be reached at annie.johnston@ wustl.edu.